Here you are… Over 50 and between jobs. Not chosen and not expected. What to do?
You’ve listened to the career experts and it’s clear: you have to get out there and talk to people; make connections… network. Call people you know – get the word out and make requests.
They make it sound so simple, don’t they? So why are people reluctant? For example, someone told you to call Joe, a decision maker, at ABC Company. But several weeks later, you haven’t made that call. Well, you’re not alone.
Workshop participants tell me that they have the name of someone who could help them, but they haven’t made contact. When I ask what holds them back, they say something like this: “It’s a great lead and I’m afraid I’ll mess it up.” Or: “It’s an intrusion. He’s not going to want to talk to me.” Bottom line, they feel vulnerable and unworthy. What is it about being between jobs that makes us feel that way?
Brené Brown, a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work. says: The greatest challenge for most of us is believing that we are worthy now, right this minute. Worthiness doesn't have prerequisites. In other words, being employed is not a prerequisite for worthiness.
To quote Dr. Brown: Letting go of our prerequisites for worthiness means making the long walk from "What will people think?" to "I am enough." But, like all great journeys, this walk starts with one step, and the first step in the journey is practicing courage.
It’s easy for the career coach or your spouse or your friend to say: “Pick up the phone and make that call.” Or “Go to that networking event and talk with people about your job search.” Or “Contact this company.” But you feel vulnerable and it's uncomfortable. May I suggest that it’s okay to feel vulnerable because we are all vulnerable at all times. You are vulnerable and worthy - even when between jobs. So be courageous: Make that call, go to that event or call that company. And check out Dr. Brown's work at www.brenebrown.com Get her TED talk on Google.
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